It’s been quite sometime since I’ve been mad at you that I’m unsure if I am. I’m not pissed, I’m not irate, I’m not upset and I’m not hurt. What is the word I’m looking for… Disappointment. There it is, I’m disappointed.
You became my friend and with your words you opened my eyes. Your words made an impression and not one of those faint impressions, it was one that continually pulls at you, tugging at you with the need for more. It was an impression that ruined me by leading me away from what ‘worked’. The place where I had no expectations, no feelings of disappointment because instead of actions mattering, good intentions were made to matter.
I need life to produce me a rewind button. Did I create the person I see when I look into your eyes? When you spoke did I translate your words into something I wanted to hear? Did I push reality aside to create a dream world where I no longer had to fold up my emotions, desires, dreams and hope?
With a heavy heart and a single tear I place you back into the deck with everyone else. I know deep down you don’t belong there but you make experiments and I make theories.
Cher was once quoted saying “Until you’re ready to look foolish, you’ll never have the possibility of being great. Well I look and feel foolish. Does this mean I will be ‘super great’ or still just ‘great’?