You tell people this is the hot spot?

The local strip club is said to be the ‘Hot Spot’. Taking a glance at the building you start to get the feeling that this is definitely not going to be ‘hot’ in any form of the imagination.

When we pull in my friend finds a parking spot, taking her time to make sure she is in an actual spot. My thought was, who cares, not like we are at some classy joint or anything. We should have made our own parking spot close to the door to help are chances of not getting mugged on our way in. Not that people are known to get mugged at this fancy establishment, it’s just better to be safe then sorry.

We enter the bar and I was immediately blown away by the clean crisp look of the place. As my eyes scanned the spacious establishment I became overwhelmed by the amount of beautifully gorgeous women and equally beautiful patrons. The stage was full of women and a large number working the floor. The place was packed and money was flowing out of men’s wallets like beer out of the tap. Okay, enough messing around, the inside was a mirror of the outside, run down. The place was dirty and had a lack of style in its decor. There were five paying customers and as for the strippers they were no where to be found. I believe people should look up what the definition of a ‘hot spot’ is! We were there though, so we might as well experience all that this bar had to offer starting with tasting their overpriced $5.00 beer. Let me run down my experience for you.

1. I have never been to a strip club that had so many interimissions. I was there for about 2 hours and they had to have at least 5 intermissions. I was starting to think someone should explain to the dancers that their job is to dance and do so on the stage to music. They may not have been clear on what their job actually entailed.

2. Once the women started to dance I notice that there wasn’t a wide range of body types. I am all about the ‘to each there own’ statement, ever man has their own taste in women. The owners should work on hiring more of a selection of body types. Also they need to hire dancers. The women didn’t really ‘work’ the stage, they looked bored. They spent more time polishing the poles with a rag. I actually thought I had it wrong and they were part of the cleaning crew. I could have done better then they did and I have only swung around the tether ball pole in middle school. New auditions are definitely in order if they want to keep this place open. This should be apparent when the men who stepped to the stage to place those crisp dollars in the women’s g-string were their boyfriends.

3. There was an arcade game in the far corner of the bar facing away from the women. I didn’t notice it until I looked over and there was a line behind it. Four men waiting their turn for an arcade game. I was told that there was a competition going on. Really? I think this is saying something about the place. They might as well have been yelling ‘you’re boring’ or ‘you’re so ugly’. An arcade game should not be the only thing to hold a mans attention in a strip club.

4. The bartender’s body language screamed bored as she sat on a bar stool wearing a coat as if she was ready to run for her life at any moment.

While the men had their arcade challenge I turned my attention to the door man. He was sporting a fancy blue polo-shirt with the word ‘STAFF’ printed in big white letters on the front. He swayed with the music while taking short breaks to check his phone as though he had actually received a call or text. He then would quickly switch to hitting on the bored looking bartender. The door man repeated these actions in this order about 10 times while I was there.

As I finished my overpriced beer and got ready to end my night, I observed dancers sitting around, some taking a break to shove cheesy bread in their mouths and others standing by the arcade game in hopes one of the men would miss the machine and accidentally slip them the coin.

I walked out, looked at my friend and said “I’m totally blogging about this!”

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