Ring Up Your Nipple

My friend has his nipples pierced and I have had the pleasure of playing with them, so believe me when I say that the ring is very poorly designed. The ball that keeps the ring closed falls out EVERY time. I personally am not impressed with the quality of the ring what so ever and am so tired of searching for that stupid little silver ball! It’s like it was only made for someone with a light touch, made for looks only, pretty much. How boring is that! So I’ve decided to educate myself on nipple rings and purchase him something more for the rough and tumble fun instead of the weak and meek.

When I googled nipple rings I was amazed that there are so many to choose from!  Did you know that there are more options for women than for me?!

Let’s look at what some of the ‘so called’ best sellers are:

1. The ‘sprinkle cupcake’ nipple shield and ring. – First of all, I find absolutely nothing appealing about this design.  Nothing.  The nipple shield is a frosted cupcake with the middle exposed for your nipple to show.  Yes, you heard me right.  A frosted cupcake with a nipple.  Word of warning to all you men out there, be careful if a women asks you if you want a cupcake because she could be referring to the one under her shirt!

2. The pinching skeleton hand nipple ring. – Picture a barbell that has a skeleton hand and when inserted through the piercing it looks as though the skeleton is pinching said nipple.  Warning, for those who may be interested in this amazing piece of jewelry, it has a wide hand span so unless someone has a seriously huge nipple, I don’t think it would touch and thus essentially lose its entire purpose.

3. The ninja spiked nipple ring. – The ninja spiked nipple ring is a circle with large spikes going around the entire ring. The ring sits flush against the skin so one wouldn’t be able to tug on the ring, which makes it loose its appeal for me if you were wondering.  I have to say it looks funny but I may actually purchase it just because the name of this item sounds cool.

4. The bullseye nipple ring. – I’m sure I don’t have to explain this one, because we can all picture it just by the name.  It really is what you imagine, a bullseye nipple ring.  Again, not appealing at all, I think. I don’t want to be on top of someone, getting frisky, and staring down at two red and white bullseyes on their chest.  Not sexy.

Lastly, I noticed many companies have ‘non-pierced nipple rings’, why? What is the point of this? One small tug and off it would come in one of the most awkward sexual moments ever.  So, let me ask you, what is the point of purchasing them?  To anyone who is looking into purchasing these fake rings, try nipple clamps.  It’s just my opinion.

Needless to say today’s ‘nipple ring’ education and shopping experience was disappointing, to say the least. I will still continue to look for something different, but strong. I am reaching the conclusion that nipple rings are hot to look at but they are completely impractical for women that like to get rough by giving a man’s nipple rings a little work out.

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2 thoughts on “Ring Up Your Nipple

  1. I have always had a curiosity about getting a nipple pierced. I never had a problem with getting an ear lobe pierced and with that same kind of ring with the bead that you’re talking about. I imagined getting that for one of my nipples. Maybe a plain and simple barbell is best.

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    1. In my opinion the barbell would be more of a hassle free way to go. If you use the ring with the ball closure and lose the ball you have to replace the entire ring. I don’t know why they don’t sell the ball separate, it definitely would be a profitable item.

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