I stumbled upon a blog by &Baguioboy123, ‘Understanding Your Child: 10 Tips’. The blog is informative and for me, it made me think.
The writer states “Friends can be found anywhere but good parents is a rare commodity these days”. My first thought, I am surrounded by wonderful parents. Over the past few years I feel as if I am the bad parent. I’m not implying the writer is wrong, I am just expressing my feelings when I read that statement. The writer also states “Friends will always have the tendency to judge your child whenever they confide their problems”. This is true and as someone who has confided their parenting problems to friends not only do you have the sense they are judging you but I feel as though I have cocooned myself into a blank filled with embarrassment. As the years have gone by I tend to hide or ‘down play’ what my child has done to avoid the feelings of embarrassment, disappointment in myself and the overall feeling of failure that I have deep inside. I have had others look at me and tell me what a good parent I am. This causes me just too uncontrollably start crying because I don’t feel that way and in my mind I think ‘if you only knew’. Sometimes I feel I am living a double life trying to hide my child’s actions.
The writer goes on to talk about other ways to help a parent understand their child; Involvement, Listening, being flexible, etc. It is all good sound parenting advice. The hard part is making these moving parts all work in harmony. Over the past 12 years I have learned that each day has to be treated as a new day. If as a parent you must do this or the issues just keep piling up until you explode. I try hard to be involved in what my child’s thoughts and feelings are but during the preteen stage I have found it is hard to get them to talk. I could explain my side eight hundred different ways and still not have him understand where I am coming from. Preteen parenting and parenting in a whole is tuff.
At the closing of the blog the writer states ‘you may not know it but teenagers do listen to their parents…Your advice is well-entrenched in their minds…the truth of the matter is it sticks’. I sure hope all of this is true for my child.
Take a moment and check out &Baguioboy123 blog at the following link: www.bubblews.com/news/4852432-understanding-your-child-10-tips