Commitment: Fearing what we need most

Image From: Pixabay
Image From: Pixabay

Commitment has been defined as the state of being dedicated to an activity or the obligation that restricts freedom of action.

Who develops commitment issues?

When you research commitment issues you will find many articles about men. In our society we view men to have more often than not, commitment issues. Anyone can develop commitment issues for a number of different reasons. Some because of past abusive relationships with family members or past significant others. People with commitment issues can love and care for family and friends easily but when they are put in a situation where there is another person outside of these people the fear of being responsible for another person can feel disabling to them. The thoughts of having to sacrifice their own needs and dreams to support another person can cause large amounts of anxiety.

What are the desires of a person with commitment issues?

Many people who carry the burden of commitment issues actually desire a close long-term intimate relationship and the security which comes with it. Having the fear of commitment can have long lasting emotional consequences and cause the person to live out a lonely existence, one void of love.

You may think many people with commitment issues stay out of relationships but that is not the case. Many times these people will seek out unattainable partners or partners who are unsuitable. Either route the person chooses they know clearly from the start that the person may never date them and or in the case where they get involved with someone who is unsuitable, they know deep down they could do better but they choose to continue the relationship because it is convenient. By choosing these types of partners they miss out on good strong relationships all in the name of avoiding what they dread most, commitment.

What is it like to live with commitment issues?

Living with the fear of commitment is a very painful experience for the person. The daily fear of having a deep emotional connection with someone and the tiring task of staying in control to protect ones emotions can take a toll on the person’s mind and body. As much as they would like to be in the present moment, accept that nothing is perfect and connect emotionally to a person, they can’t make it over the wall they have constructed to keep them safe from their fears.

2 thoughts on “Commitment: Fearing what we need most

  1. Great post. I also think that sometimes people with commitment issues do end up in reasonably good relationships, but they end up sabotaging them by holding back in the relationship.


    1. Thank you. I have to say my commitment issues have caused me to sabotage things prior to it even getting started. It only took me 14 years to see what I am doing and admit it out loud. I have to say I am glad my commitment issues developed this way than hurting someone in the long run by holding back within a relationship. If I can get rid of my commitment issues, now that would be a beautiful day indeed.

      Liked by 1 person

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