Because I Said So



Over the last 15 years I have learned many things. I’ve found myself, and I’ve really lost myself. (You may say you can’t really lose yourself, but trust me that after a few bottles of wine you can misplace yourself in the blink of an eye.) I’ve loved people, and then lost those people too. (Not from the wine though.) I’ve met people, and I have missed opportunities to know people that one day I could miss.

I’ve been a mother, a friend, a boss, a daughter, a sister, a mechanic, a plumber, an electrician, a house keeper, a painter, a landscaper, a chauffeur and a cheerleader. Boy o’boy, the list goes on and on. Throughout these last 15 years I’ve been so many things and by doing all of those things I have had triumphs worthy of trophies, (I’m still waiting for the delivery of these trophies but rest assured I earned them, and they are big trophies not those small ones everyone gets for just participating these days.) I’ve made mistakes by doing what I thought at the time was surely the right thing, and on the same hand I’ve made mistakes by doing what I knew was the wrong thing. I’ve experienced happy moments, sad moments, and I’ve visited (at times frequently, like, multiple times in a day) the bottom of the darkest and deepest pits. I’ve thought, ‘Well, of course this is happening to me, I deserve it’.  I’ve thought, ‘Why me’.  On an occasion or two, or three, or okay many times, that it was very possible I was living in the twilight zone. I’ve dreamt of a richer life, of fame, of happiness, of revenge and of things better than the moment I was living in at the time. I’ve loved, I’ve hated, I’ve carried around resentment, I’ve forgiven and I’ve forgotten. (Mostly forgotten because I have a really bad memory, lucky for me and those people I dreamt of getting revenge from.)

What is my take away from the last 15 years? What could possibly be so important that little old me would feel the need to sit down and tell you? Yes, normal me, with a normal life, normal career and normal friends would have something important to say? Well here it is, so listen up because I’m only going to say this once. (Okay, I’m only going to type this once.)


I know what you are thinking.  You have heard that about a million times, in a million inspirational videos that have taken up prime real-estate on your social news feeds, but hear me out. What I have to say is better than any of those videos. (They probably tell you that in their videos too, but it’s not true.)

You can dream of a better life, better friends, better career but you will never get it, because it will probably be something that only plays on your dream play list. Only when you take responsibility, and take hold of your own life will you move forward in life. You are the only one who controls you. If you’re waiting around spending your days wondering why, holding onto your past by replaying those dark moments in your life, you will never move forward. You will never achieve those dreams on your play list, and you will never be truly happy.

If you are waiting around for someone to fix your situation, someone who will swoop down like superman to save you from the life your living; or thinking, ‘If only someone would come and help you’, you’re wasting not only your time but your life. You are the only person with the power to change your situation, change your thought process, and move your life forward. Until you are able to recognize and truly see the moment you are living right now, you will never move forward. You will never carry anything but hatred for what your life has become and what you have become. You have to accept what your life is and who you are right now. You have to forgive the people and situations that have wronged you. You have to stop waiting and start moving forward. The sooner you find acceptance, the sooner you can reach your true potential and say hello to happiness again. Life will beat you down, make you cry, call you names.  Life is a bully, and if you sit around and don’t participate in what is needed to get you up and moving forward life will have you chained down and duck taped to that chair you occupy. (If this is what you choose, you better hope that chair you occupy is one of those comfy, cozy lazy-boy chairs because you will be there for an eternity and your butts sure going to start getting sore, if it isn’t already.)

Forgiving the life that has bullied you doesn’t make it right, or make life the winner. It makes you right and you the winner. By committing to your dreams and passions, by being fearless, you cannot fail.



Being committed and fearless will be the most amazing thing you will ever experience. It is empowering to be independent and experience success, no matter what aspect it is. One day you too will be patiently awaiting those trophies to arrive.


2 thoughts on “Because I Said So

  1. I totally agree with finding your passion and pursuing that passion with avengeance. I find that I don’t “hate” anyone but may dislike the actions of some of the people who come and go in my life. I just don’t have room in my life for hate. I have recently taken up distance running (my time to say prayers of gratitude and meditate) where I can selfishly keep myself physically and mentally fit. I am an empath (rare in physicians) who connects deeply with my students and patients- makes my life richer. I am thankful for my health, my affirming friends and my wonderful profession (surgeon/professor). I just keep going!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Entering through your one eye displayed I could see how you see or have seen life and this world.
    So to say its been an Autobiography in a few paras.
    Yes the World is so, until unless one realizes and has experience for self no matter howmuchsoever is given as an advice or caution one does not not realize. But we cannot afford to stop telling it. This is a process and it continues.
    One step ahead with caution has to be the Mantra.
    Casey King!


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